trust in God for strength!

Well what a muppet i have been the last few days.
I woke up this morning the same as i have for the last few days, feeling misrable. I had no idea why, i have been reading my bible and praying more then i have been recently and really learning a lot from scripture. I thought that i should be happy after all i have God on my side looking after me. The thing that was getting me down more was how ill i have been. I am still i'll and i was fed up. I was trying to rely on my own strength to get me through...

I woke up this morning and felt that i had to read some more of Humility true Greatness by C.J Mahaney. I haven't read any of this book recently as when i have felt up to reading i have either been reading C.J's Christ our mediator, finding passion at the cross, a very good book again by C.J. It was a very challenging book that really made me think a lot, or the bible.
i picked up the book and started to read. Not far in to where i left off i reached the following passage
"One morning i am profoundly aware that God is near to me, while the next day i can sense only his absence. In a matter of hours i go from what seems to be an effortless experience of pure joy to asking, "where are you? Where did you go?"
The fact is of course, He didn't go anywhere. Yesterday He allowed me to sense His presence; today He seems to be sending the message, " I want you to grow more in your trust in Me; therefore, I'm withdrawing that sense of My nearness."

The passage highlighted in blue is the passage that really struck me, i realised that this passage was true to me, not only did i realise that, i realised how much i had been relying on my strength and not God's during this time. " I want you to grow more in your trust in me;" those words seemed to jump out of the book and hit me. God wants me to grow more in my trust with him. He gives me these times of trial to learn these things, and that is what i hope has happened!

It is during our times of weakness that we are most strong, we hear paul saying the following in 2 corinthians 12:9-10
But he said to me, " My grace is sufficiant for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore i will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. " For the sake of Christ, then i am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and calamities. For when i am weak, then i am strong."

we should really use our times of weakness to grow in trust of God, to allow God to give us his strength instead of relying on our own! obviously we need to do this always and not just in times of weakness, but as i am sure that you are all aware if you are at all like me, it is during times of weakness that we are least likely to remember. Let God be your strength at all times. Don't let your own pride get in the way, as God hates pride!

PRAISE GOD

- for showing me all you have shown me today
- for all you have taught me through your word over the last few days
- for all my friends, family and b/f paul
- for your awesome creation
- for people that write books that show us you
- for your word
- for all those who have encouraged me lately

Amen

lexi's christening!!! (with lots of piccys)

well this 1st picture is of me and alexander-james. Alex was SO well behaved during the service, and was very confused at why there was being water put on his head without him being in the bath! Alex loves baths!!! The service was good, apart from a lot of the sermon that i did not agree with. I wasn't sure what type of CofE church it would be, but in terms of the music it was very much like All Saints. fairly lively. Just some dodgy teaching.
It was weird being welcomed, i was welcomed by one of my reception class teachers, who recognised me immediatly... how scary is that. she was one of the teachers that i loved. A little (what i thought) old lady who would read to us. well she cant have really been that old, i was sure that she must be dead by now, but i was wrong. I really am the type of person that once you have meet me once, i am never forgotten. I also saw someone from Holy Trinity Hurstpierpoint. My old church. Paul and others are right, i cant go anywhere without being known by someone... but i dont know everyone paul :P

This next picture is of parents, Godparents and the vicar. We have going from left to right... Uncle Mark(godfather) Me, Rachel (mum) the vicar and lexi who is fast asleep despite being moved from pillar to post. Paul (Dad), lou (godmum) and Barry (godfather)







The 2 pictures below are of the 2 sides of the family. The 1st picture shows the 4 generations of rachels side and the 2nd shows pauls family.














we then have a picture (i am very sorry tigz) of tigz, rachel, lexi and me. The last 3 pictures all taken at mooch, the 1st part of the after party. lexi enjoyed a little bit more sleep before having lots to eat.
We then have a the 1st picture of paul with lexi once everyone had left rachels for the buffet (prepared very nicely by tigz! a big thank you tigz). I think that one day paul will make an exellent dad. He spent most of the day entertaining rachels brother who has ADHD and did an amazing job of it. rhys was SO well behaved and we are all so happy about that!!!!!! Thank you to paul for helping to keep rhys out of the way of everyone. You then got to hold lexi, and he just loves you. He gave you such a nice hug, and you 2 talked to each other and had a fun time together.














This is the 2nd picture of paul holding lexi, don't they look so happy together. Paul then did a VERY brave thing. I am so proud of you hun. With 4 people in the room who all knew how to change a nappy, paul changed alex's nappy for him. It wasn't quite as easy as just changing a disposible either as he is in clothy's. Rachel even said that it was better then some of the nappies that his own dad does. so i think that deserves a huge WELL DONE PAUL!!!!!!
( the top that alex is wearing there says 'very important person (that's me) and how true that was for him on the day of his christening)

I plan to take my vows as Godmum VERY seriously. I am so blessed to have been asked to have such an honerable job to do. And i will do it to the best of my ability!
I want Alex to grow up knowing God's love, wether it is God's plan or not for lex to accept jesus as his own i am still going to nurture him in the knowledge of God to the best of my ability (given to me of course by God).

well i dont think that i have said all that i wanted to say, but i have stuff to do and i have to be out soon so after some links and some praise God points i shall be off... link 1 is lexi's blog for more on the christening. next is tigz. And finally some more pics from the christening can be found here, you need to clic on friends, and then lexi's christening.


PRAISE GOD POINTS

- for how well behaved lexi was
-for the family all getting on well together
- for my wonderful boyfriend
-for my wonderful friends
- for the love that you show each one of us
- for your creation
- for looking after me when i am ill

AMEN!!!

more ramblings in the life of Adele

well since i can't sleep and have now been awake for over an hour (its only 7:30 at the mo) and i slept really badly last night i have decided to give up on the sleep idea and blog instead!

so whats happened since my last blog?? Not much really. I am still being sick, however not as much as i have realised that it is mainly fluids that are making me sick so i have got some 'thick and easy' thickener for food and drinks. Its not greatly pleasent in taste or texture, but i am now at least getting some fluids into me so hopefully i can stop myself getting to dehydrated and can keep myself out of hospital!! I have been tested for a bacteria that can live in the stomach called helicobacter. Should hopefully get the results today. part of me really hopes that it is this cus then at least i know how it can be treated and get this sickness behind me. But apparently the treatment really isn't nice so part of me hopes its not.

we had valentines day since my last blog, and what a lovely day it was!! Paul gave me the sweetest alternative to a card, if you wish to see you can se it here. I also got 12 red roses and a book by john piper called 'The misery of Job and the mercy of God' its a really great poem about Job, it also includes the CD of the poem. The book is very nicely illistrated and very nicely set out. I think it only takes about 45 mins in total to read/listen to, but is split into 4 sections if you dont have the time to do it in one go. I was gripped however, and once i started i wanted to finish it!!! If you want to listen to the poem then go here and scroll down the page until you get to 1994-Job. It was SO nice to see paul again! I had missed him SO much over the couple of weeks we have been apart. I get to see him again either tonight or tomorrow, and i can't wait!!:) Love you Paul!

I have also been catching up on some of my missed bible readings. I haven't totally caught up yet, but i am on my way. Isn't it great how much God allows us to learn about him through his word, and how life transforming it is!!! I love reading the bible SO much, i just wish that i would make the time more often as it is such a valuble thing that should be done every day. It is down to my sinful nature that it doesn't.

Other then that i have been spending time with Rachel and Lexi. Its been SO nice spending so much time with them both. Things have been hectic there end arranging the christening on sunday. 2 more days and i will be officially Godmum to Alex. How blessed am i to have such a beautiful boy as my Godson, and such a wonderful friend in Rachel. If you want to see Alex's blog which contains some VERY cute pictures of him then go here.

well that is it (thank goodness do i hear you cry...)

Praise God points!

- that i got to see a dr that is actually trying to find out what is wrong with me.
- for having such a lovely b/f
- for having such great friends
- for the plans all coming together for sunday
- for your word

AMEN

quick update

hey guys,
i am SO sorry that i haven't blogged in such a long time, but as some of you are aware i have not been at all well, and i still am not.
i am unable to keep fluids down, and am having probs with food too, i have even got so desperate i have taken to eating baby food as its more gentle on the stomach... was even slightly sick on that. the only thing i havent had to much probs with so far is scrambled egg on toast. i am slightly sick after that, but not as much as i am on some other stuff.
sorry i know that this is not the nicest of blog posts... but this is more for my records that i am typing this now.
At least i am not as ill as i was a few weeks ago when i was in hospital. It was a rather scary experiance... especaialy as i wasn't even able to pick a bible up. i am still having some probs with reading my bible though, as concentration levels are not good at all.
i think the most scary thing though was my heart... its not been much below 100 recently, and in hosp it managed to go to 174... i couldn't breath and had to have an oxygen mask to breath through, i had cheast pain, and i lost all feeling in my arms. i was scared that i was having a heart attack... i prayed as much as i could in the situation and paul and tigz prayed too, and slowley my pulse began to drop again. The ECG was high but normal. So that was a relief all round!!
i was in hosp for a week in the end... even had the chance to talk about God with some of the nurses and patients which was really nice:)
was back in A&E on monday as i started being sick again, and aparently looked as ill as i did in hosp...
God is amazing, and is always there looking after us even if sometimes we dont think he is... sometimes i have to remember that when i am this ill. But God is in full control and knows what is happening!!
God is teaching me a lot too... he is teaching me how much i need to depend on him and not on myself in times on trouble. To let him be my rock! my prayer life has got slightly better again through being ill... so it really shows that God uses all bad for good!!:D
i want to say a HUGE thank you to Paul and Tigz especially for all the help and hard work that they put in whilst i was ill, it was really hugely appreciated... and Tigz i really hope that you get your bounce back soon!!! am praying for your recovery! thanks to all the others out there that helped whilst i was ill, with visiting, praying or just being there to support paul and tigz. THANK YOU ALL!!!!!
anyway i should go now as i need to go to bed!! But 1st........

PRAISE GOD POINTS!!!!!!!

- for God teaching me so much through being ill
- for all the help and support God has given to me
- to my friends and family, who have been amazing (and i also want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone that has supported me in prayer!!!!!!)
- for the doctors and nurses that looked after me whilst i was ill
- for giving me most of my strength back even though i am still ill
- for your wonderful creation
- for paul, my wonderful boyfriend
- for being sovereign!:D

AMEN!!!!!!!!!